The Day I Stopped Shrinking in Rooms I Was Called to Lead
There is a specific kind of exhaustion that comes from making yourself smaller than God made you.
I know what it feels like to walk into a room with everything God placed in you and spend the entire time managing how much of it you let people see. Carefully measuring your words. Adjusting your presence. Performing the version of yourself that feels safest.
That is not humility. That is fear wearing humility's clothes.
The moment I recognized it
I was sitting in a meeting where I knew the answer. I knew the strategy. I had the experience and the insight to move the entire room forward. And I said nothing.
Not because I did not know. Because somewhere deep down I did not fully believe I had the right to take up that much space.
That was the moment I realized self-doubt was not just affecting my confidence. It was affecting my calling.
What God was actually asking
Esther did not shrink back and the entire trajectory of her people changed because she did not. She was afraid. The text makes that clear. She fasted, she prepared, she leaned into her community. And then she stepped forward anyway.
God does not call you into rooms so you can manage how much of yourself shows up. He calls you in so you can bring everything He placed in you.
What shifting this required
It required me to stop treating my past wounds as disqualifiers and start understanding them as part of my preparation. It required someone walking with me through the places where the fear lived so I could name it, face it, and stop letting it make decisions for me.
It was not a one time prayer. It was a process.
And it is a process I now have the privilege of walking through with other women who are sitting in rooms where they know they were called to lead, but something is telling them to stay small.
If that is you, you do not have to figure this out alone.
Book your free Curiosity Call through the link in my bio. Let's talk about what it looks like to finally stop shrinking.
